In a relationship, we often need to compromise and settle for certain things. Finding common ground is very important to build a healthy space for emotion, trust and loyalty in a relationship. However, in a relationship, certain elements are non-negotiable and should be for the right reasons. “The word settling just means coming to an agreement, a compromise. A healthy relationship requires a fair share of settling and flexibility…until we start crossing our limits and compromising non-negotiables,” wrote Therapist Maria G Sosa. Speaking of the frequency and the inconsistency of the elements, Maria further added, “There will be times when things are inconsistent, when boundaries are crossed, when mistakes are made, etc. Nothing is ever as black and white as these slides. And if these are happening frequently and the norm instead of the exception, maybe it’s a good time to pause and assess if this is the type of relationship, we’re wanting for ourselves.”
Inconsistency: Inconsistency in a relationship is a major sign of not being committed in the relationship. A healthy relationship is based on consistent understanding and effort from both ends.
Undesired level of commitment: Every person has a different ask from a relationship. The idea of commitment may also vary in a relationship. However, if our idea of commitment does not match with that of the partner, we should not try to settle.
Lack of intimacy: Intimacy, be it physical, sexual or emotional, is one of the foundation blocks of a relationship. Lack of intimacy indicates the loss of interest and understanding in a relationship.
Dishonesty: This is a non-negotiable element in a relationship. A healthy relationship is based on transparency and honesty. Being lied to and cheated on are major red flags in a relationship.
Mistreatment: Being bullied, abused and shamed are types of mistreatments and should not be tolerated in any kind of relationship.
